Tomorrow is Magha Purnima, a significant day for followers of Mahima Dharma, a faith my grandfather was connected to. It's also a personally meaningful date, as I began my first job on this very tithi. It felt like a blessing, a direct link to my ancestors. Unfortunately, I had to leave my work five years ago, and I've been searching for the right opportunity to return to work ever since. While I'm eager to start again, nothing suitable has materialized.
I sometimes struggle with feelings of frustration, questioning why I've lost so many people and things I cherish. It's hard not to wonder if this is some kind of karmic retribution, and I've spent a lot of time introspecting, trying to understand if there's a deeper purpose to this period of waiting. Frankly, though, I just miss what I've lost. The pain of unmet expectations and the difficulty of letting go are a heavy burden. Why does life have to be so challenging? This extended period of waiting for a breakthrough is agonizing, but I know I must persevere, regardless of how I feel.
Why this long period without the things I long for? What is the direction of my life now?
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