Thursday, October 31, 2013

ILL-FATED events that can turn life up-side down.

Hi Readers,

This blog is about my thoughts on some incident that can change a person's life altogether. I got to write about it, after hearing a painful news yesterday.

One of the intercity bus from operator Jabbar Travels met with an accident on the way from Bangalore to Hyderabad. The driver wanted to overtake a car when its front tyre burst and the diesel fuel tank adjacent to it exploded. It immediately caught fire and fire started to expand through the AC neon gas chamber. People could not escape because the central locking system did not gave them a easy way to come out. Only seven people could escape the accident and rest 45 people were burnt alive.

One of them was a techie from Cuttack, he was returning home to meet his newborn baby girl, born just 6 days before. My parents knew his family. Though, I never met him, I came to know that his father is suffering from paralysis, his mother has got retirement from her job few years ago and he has a young brother. Well, this is just any other ill-fated accident that kills and swaps families. Many techies, including a fresher who just got a offer letter, a couple who went for health check up and people who came to their families to celebrate Diwali met with this accident.  I was discussing about it with my mom, when she said why people do not like some children just like the newborn baby girl who lost her father just after her birth.

True, is not it. When her mother would watch her, she would be reminded of her beloved husband. Her grandparents would get reminded of their son's demise. It is true she is not the culprit, but this happened just after her birth. Her birthday, would haunt everyone of her father's demise. When she will grow up, even she will bear this pain always. She could be the only reason why her mother would fight with this trauma of loosing her husband. She has to be strong and would have to struggle to meet the needs of her child. This relates to the life of one of my cousin.

I have a cousin sister, whose husband went missing when she was merely six months pregnant, her marriage was not even a year long, when suddenly her husband disappeared. They used to stay at Kolkata, where her husband was working. When she was pregnant, her brother also came to stay with them. One day, her husband went for shopping and never returned. Its been more than 15 yrs now. Her daughter who was born after 3 months of this event is now in college. She named her Pal Pratikshya meaning waiting for the moment. In short waiting for her father to return. She has been struggling for her life and her child's future since then. Somehow, I also understand only because of her child she could sustain all stress.She could overcome the tragic incident and became courageous enough to fight back and stand on her own feet. She started working, living all alone with a little kid. She had to face ridiculous comments coming from relatives and society. I do not know why, but people criticize the survivor a lot? Why? Just because, that person did not gave up. It is also true people have sympathy. But, some people are just very happy to see someone in pain. They give additional pain on top of it by their words.

But, thinking about the child sometimes, I feel more pain. Just because the child lost someone important in life just before or after her birth, she is not loved the way she would have received it. That is fate. What can one do? The mother has two important people in her life, one is her child and other her husband. She just can't be happy loosing one. Same thing happens to girls when they get married, if something bad happens, she is blamed. As though she has created that event herself. Moreover, people also remark, had a boy be born. What is the difference with a newborn girl or a boy? If its a boy can the child immediately after birth take care of his family. Even if its a boy or a girl, they need family support to attain a certain age, when they can be responsible or help the mother.

But, this is our notion, societal norm that only a boy is eligible to take care of parents. Gender is enough to help the parents. How? I really do not understand it. But, I know this is not going to change at-least for my generation. I hope this mentality changes and makes a better society for girls in our next generation.

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